Self-Kindness is a gift to others

Do you ever feel guilty for taking some time for self-care when there are so many who are suffering?

I feel this at times: when I’m lying on the acupuncture bed receiving a relaxing treatment, or walking in the sunshine and fresh air in my neighborhood when so many are affected by flooding and wildfires and war.

Here’s the thing: showing compassion to yourself doesn’t mean you’re taking away from anyone else. It’s not an “either–or” type of thing. In fact, if you take care of yourself with intention, your well-being has ripple effects into the world.

The Dali Lama calls this “intelligent selfishness,” which understands that we’re all connected.

The ancient meditation technique Tonglen (translated as “taking and giving”) is a guiding principle for me when I catch myself feeling guilty when doing something for myself.

Basically, it goes like this:

  1. While breathing in, become aware of one or more people who are suffering and imagine gently removing their pain.
  2. Breathing out, imagine your breath filling them with compassion and healing.
  3. Keep expanding the circle of goodwill as you breathe.

This is one simple way to spread self-kindness to others. It may not seem like much, but done with intention, you’d be surprised how powerful this can be.

If you’ve been suffering from “empath paralysis” with all the difficulties in our world, I invite you to consider how you’re taking care of YOU.

One of the things I love the most about energy clearing is that when ONE person comes into better balance, it makes a difference in the people around them — their family, friends, co-workers, which extends outward even beyond that!

It’s not unusual for clients to report that following an energy clearing session their relationships improve, or a situation they thought was going to be difficult turned out quite well.

Is it time for some undivided attention on YOU and bring balance to your system?

Let’s keep the conversation going

Have you ever thought it was selfish to do something nice for yourself when so many in our world are struggling? What have you found that works for you to find peace in the midst of our turbulent world? What self-kindness practices do you have? Share in the comments — I’d love to hear!

About Manda

I’m Manda Stack, Intuitive Coach and Energy Clearing Specialist. I’ve dedicated my life to helping people get calm, clear, and connected so that they can make empowered decisions to live with joy, confidence, and freedom. My signature services include intuitive coaching and personal energy clearing sessions, which are done virtually through Zoom sessions. Click here for more information.



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Manda Stack

Manda Stack

Intuitive Coach and Energy Clearing Specialist, Manda supports your expansion into a life of living your purpose in freedom and confidence.